The Church Roster Theorem

Ryan and I came up with a new theorem, whose effects we have all felt before: the Church Roster Theorem.

The Church Roster Theorem states that only half of those in attendance will actually sign the roster. This is due largely to those guys who take forever signing the role and then have no clue where to pass it next, even though it was announced beforehand where it should be passed.

This newly discovered theorem has already been shown to be true. It explains why my first elder's quorum at BYU thought that I was a less-active member.